Anne Smith :: Blog for Dec. 2009
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"Christmas is Here" on the Child Musicians page.
Seasons’ Greetings…this time of year brings a lot of emotions to the surface, am I right? Personally, this year seems a bit more emotional than others. I think I’ll save the New Year stuff for the January blog…don’t want to start thinking about all the things I haven’t done yet this year, and all the things I expect to accomplish in 2010! Wow. That’s all I can say. Wow. That’s what Al says when he is overwhelmed. It’s his way of making light of something too crushing to understand. Al is the most wonderful, gentle being you would ever want to meet. He is 91 and was, in his prime, a brilliant and informed collector of stamps, coins, art and great wine; partner in a multi-million dollar business, devoted husband, father, and friend. He really is a “wow” of a man.
Alzheimer’s Disease and a congestive heart have reduced his existence to countless doctor’s visits and many hours of solitaire on the computer. Al doesn’t complain or lash out at anyone. He retains his gentle and beatific outlook. “I love you so much”, he tells his wife, “You’re my life”. This he knows beyond a doubt. He probably says it 25 times a day. I contemplate his life, his tremendous journey, his accomplishments; it’s true, that what remains, after everything else is gone, is the loving energy that we create during our time here on earth.
I am inspired by Al to be mindful of my own relationships with my family, my loved ones and those others whom I will encounter in my life.
It is easy to become knocked down by circumstances-some of which are beyond our control. We can control our perceptions and reactions, however, which will dictate our own personal history, our own Book of Life.
I know that I’m not the only one to feel time speeding away from me; to feel frustrated with the lack of resources to accomplish my dreams. Sometimes I encounter individuals who are so angry and hopeless that they affect my energy and threaten to suck me into their world…(really, in New York City? That never happened to you?) Try telling yourself this: they are as real as you want them to be. Do you want them to become “tenants of your mind”? Or do you want to fade them out with the strongest light imaginable? Believe me, I can’t always find the strength to practice what I am preaching. Maybe in my own way, I am reaching out to you to encourage a Light Movement. Promise me, that if you are reading this, that just once (after all, we are only human), whenever you feel enraged or defeated, before you get sucked in, breathe light. Be light. Know that it is only as real as you want it to be. Don’t be afraid, don’t feel discouraged. If you have to say anything, say “wow”. And move on. I was going to end my blog here, but just remembered a funny (to me) story: a few years ago I was unpacking a shipment of instruments in a class of four-year olds on the Upper East Side. We eagerly read the description on a small rectangular box: The ‘Wow’ Earth Bell. I explained to the children that the bell was going to make the same vibration as our earth, as it turned on its axis. Pretty special, huh? I removed a small tubular object from the box. It was a bright purple color, with a sound hole and rubber mallet. A pregnant pause as I prepared to strike it. I don’t know what the children expected to see or hear, but judging from their expressions, it was very obviously not what issued forth from this highly overrated thing. They politely waited until the very last note faded away. Rolling his eyes, one of the boys said, sarcastically, “wow!”. This feels like a good place to stop, especially if it made you smile. Sending you all light, love and best wishes for a beautiful and safe celebration of the close of 2009.
Until next time, xoxo Annie